Thursday, February 28, 2008

Searching for a Dress...






"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved." - Helen Keller

Well it is 6 am and I have been awake since 3:30am...this insomnia monster creeps up on me every now and then, more often than usual actually...which is worrying. My little boy climbs into my bed every morning between 2 and 4 and that wakes me up, tonight my hubby is sleeping in the spare room, Max in our bed, Payton in her bed and mom downstairs surfing the net for a "Ball" dress!?!? (the Ball is April 5th, so there is still time) Insanity - I do think so.

I have no idea what I am going to wear. I have spotted these lovely dresses, but am not too sure...Lets just say I have put on quite a few pounds in the last couple of years and I am not the size 12 I used to be. The above dresses are from Monsoon, and all look lovely and charming flat on the "page", but who knows what they will look like over a lumpy, bumpy body!I am not sure whether to go for something sleek and modern, or vintage and lacy...

Weight plus motherhood plus being in your thirties is a strange thing - I have friends who are battling with weight and self image at this stage in their lives and I can't decide whether or not it is a media thing, or whether we just look in the mirror some days and not like the body image we see before us.Whatever it is I find it very frustrating, but I also find myself a part of it. Worrying all the time that I am too fat, and getting bigger, that my hair looks flat and lifeless, that I have yet another wrinkle. Oh to be free of those worries would be bliss! Yawn.

10 comments:

laura said...

Both dresses are lovely...I understand your feelings and observations about your weight, but when I look at your picture I see a beautiful body. I know it's all relative, but as someone who has serios weight to lose (about 80 pounds)it's hard to know that my body has evolved into what other women would view as their worst nightmare. I hear my thin friends worrying completely understand (again)that it is relative...but I'd love to be a position to even wonder if those dresses would look nice...because at this moment it seems so far away.

Your honesty in your posts is nice.

Jasminé said...

Hi Laura
Thank you for your lovely comment.
That pic is old..nearly two years ago..I have picked up so much weight since then and am short, so I just look round and dumpy, plus I have big boobs (not bragging) and so I look top heavy too...
Its nice to "speak" to someone who can relate about weight issues, I enjoy being open about things like that.
Believe me I have some very slim friends, too and they also worry about their weight constantly.
Its such an issue in this day and age.
take care

prettyshabby said...

hi Jasmine, great post ..there's a lot of us that can relate to body issues out there! I used to be a size 10-12 and still looked in the mirror and wasn't happy I've put on a lot of weight(and I'm short with big boobs too!!)and I worry about what others think all the time.I think it's a confidence thing..I never notice if someone is bigger if their personality shines through..you just think "wow what a great person..she was nice"..so do the old positive image thing..say to yourself something positive about your appearance 10 times a day when you look in the mirror, repeating the sentence each time...it's meant to work..I'm still trying it! The dresses are fabulous..I would love to be choosing one, my sister always gets her posh-do dresses from Monsoon..my wedding dress was the last one I wore 11 years ago!!
I agree with laura, your honesty is great..
Sairer

Anonymous said...

The dresses are all lovely, get yourself along to Monsoon and try them on.
Re body image: The media don't help at all. I think it's partly to do with our "young" obsession, if you look at teenage girls they have completly different bodies to 30 year olds and of course motherhood does change everything. Well media seems to favour the teenage body as an example of beauty which of course it is but it isn't the only one and it seems a shame that so many women feel pressured to try and make themselves look like 16 year olds, cos it ain't gonna work!
When I was in my 20's I used to obsess about wrinkles and grey hair, I spent a fortune on anti-wrikle creams and hilights, now they are actually arriving I find that I really don't mind at all and feel far more comfortable in my own skin than I did then. Even though it is lumpy and dumpy and losing the fight against gravity. If I had saved all that money I could probably afford to be lifted now! Only kidding about the lift I'm too much of a scaredy cat to go under the knife.
Carolyn
http://willowhouse.typepad.com

Elissa - Managing Autism said...

These dresses are lovely!! I'm sure whatever you choose will be beautiful!
When I'm choosing a dress I always try to find one that feels great on... that always helps with the 'body image' thing.

serendipitylovesnewyork said...

Hi...I used to work in monsoon, the dresses are so beautiful in there...definatly go and try them on!!! Have a great weekend x

serendipitylovesnewyork said...

Hi...I used to work in monsoon, the dresses are so beautiful in there...definatly go and try them on!!! Have a great weekend x

Ragged Roses said...

Hello! I love all those dresses, perhaps the black one is my favourite (I recently went to an exhibition at the local museum about little black dresses and I'm in love all over again with them). The best thing to do would be to try them on, but on a good day when you're feeling good about yourself. There are some days when I go shopping and I can't bear to look in the mirror! Take care and good luck with the sleeping
Kimx

julia said...

I love the black dress! My body image seems to change depending on the time of month, sometimes I'm quite happy with what I see and then sometimes I just avoid the mirror (bit of a problem in this house because I have so many of the flipping things!)I'm happier with myself the older I get, don't get me wrong, I'd love the pre children size 10 body back but there are fewer pressures now I'm edging towards 40!
By the way "magic knickers" from ebay are fab under tight clothes, they come right up to boob level and down to the knee, attractive in a corset sort of way!
Have a lovely weekend!
Julia x

Jasminé said...

Thank you for all your lovely and encouraging comments.
x